A former working mom trying to figure out what being a SAHM is all about.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Change is Coming

Quality Time
The time has come. I must go back to work.

I'm happy. I'm sad. I'm nervous. I'm excited.

When my husband went back to grad school for ministry in 2005 we knew it meant having financial hardships for a few years and eventually moving away from our families. All I asked was that I could be a SAHM for a while when he was finally called to his own church. 

Well, we moved here in 2009 and I became a SAHM to my then three year old son and six-month-old daughter. I didn't think I could make it after the first month. I was ready to pull my hair out! But, we finally got into a routine and I loved it. I missed a lot of the adult things, like lunch hours and conversation. I also realized what a gift staying home was for me.

After having my son in 2006 I returned to work full-time after twelve weeks of maternity leave. It was hard leaving him but I had no choice. I had to work.  When our daughter was born in 2009 we had already moved once. I had a new job and could only stay out for eight weeks and then had to return to work. Again, I had to work.

Then my husband was called to VA. He kept his promise and I got to stay home. I realized what I missed while I worked when my son was little. I don't regret it but I am sad that someone else got to see everything I missed.  More than once I've sat back and wondered, 'How in the world did I get all this done when I worked?'  I've learned what an incredible person it takes to work and be a wife and mother and take care of a home while making sure your kid doesn't turn into a serial killer. What's more amazing are the millions of moms and dads who do it every day!

So, in a few weeks I will return to work, this time only part-time. A few days a week. It will help me ease back into the real world. For some reason I think leaving my kids this time will be even harder then when they were infants.  They have become my side kicks, my partners in crime.

I am excited about entering the adult world again! Having conversations that involve subjects other than Buzz Lightyear and trains is a huge plus! I think I'm really going to enjoy my job.

Most of me can't wait to get started. The part of my heart that is with my kids is dragging a little though.


Amanda said...

I know how you feel. I go back to work in 2 weeks and know the first day I leave my son at day care is going to be torture.

Savvy and Chic Mommy said...

bummmer... I hated going back to work after my maternity leave. just like you I had to go back. Godd luck!

Found you on a Sunday Blog Hop
New Follower ~ Tasha

Anonymous said...

Thanks so much for stopping by and for following! I am returning both! :) Have a wonderful day!

Julie @ a-journey-not-a-race.blogspot.com

Billie R said...

New GFC follower as well as FB. Feel free to stop by.

Elle said...

Yep that's gonna be a big change. It will be exciting though..and the time away from your kids will make the time with them seem more valuable. And the adult conversations will help you keep sane. Good luck!

new follower. www.wyrdings.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Hi there.
I'm passing through from the Monday hops.
Stop on by if you can.

My Mommymoon said...

I am a new follower

My son is 3 months and I am already having anxiety about that as well.

I can't say I know how you feel. Good luck and you have really beautiful children.

Meant to be Mom said...

Gosh, in some ways I can totally relate. I have only one child right now and we are talking about number two, which will mean me staying home. I want this so badly, but I just don't know to get it "all done". I am now a follower! I found you on Bloggy Moms February Blog Hop!

Michelle said...

Good Luck with the transition! I left an "award" for you on my blog!


Have a wonderful day!

Loree said...

I know it will feel like that for me too when I go to work again! I am a new follower, and on FB too :) Stop by my blog when you can , http://sew-chic-designs.blogspot.com/ :) Thanks so much!!

Hi! I'm Jessica said...

I remember having those same feelings when going back to work after my oldest was born. I'm soo thankful to be home full-time now. Following you from the blog hop. Hope you'll stop by my blog when you have a chance as well. Check out the Organo Gold Giveaway on my site. It ends tomorrow night and has low entries!